


Two Broken Hearts

by noelle_styles_8



Category: Colby Brock - Fandom
Genre: Bi, Cool, F/F, Lesbian, Love, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-21
Updated: 2020-01-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:28:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22352614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noelle_styles_8/pseuds/noelle_styles_8
Summary: I'm not going to put it on here because I have the actual summary or description on my wattpad
Relationships: Lillian Scott/Riley Scott





	Two Broken Hearts

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
Ever since the break up between Noelle and I, my dreams have been haunting me. Not only by my own personal demons whom she used to help me fight off just by being on my arms but by the memory of me leaving her stranded on Lincoln Street. Her heartbroken and terrified. Every morning before I wake up I have the same awful nightmare:

She tugs the sleeves of my long-sleeve t-shirt to where the thumbhole placed in both sleeves has her thumb into it to cover her knuckles. Tight black skinny jeans cover her lower half, as a black beanie of mine pushes back her red-dyed hair. My hand slowly lets go of hers. I study her moves.  
The way her hair moves slowly, and her lips part as she says, "Ry, you've been strange, what's wrong?"  
My arms try to keep away from her grasp, as I push back my tousled brown hair.  
I mutter "No, you don't."  
Tears brim her eyes, she isn't the one who doesn't love the other, it's me. I'm incapable of loving anyone.  
She backs away, hurt in her eyes "I do, I really do," I back up, and stammer "Noelle, n-no, you d-don't."  
Tears escape her eyes as I see her heartbreak even more. I'm the one who can't love her. I've never loved anyone. Except now. So why can't I say I love her? This is the girl I love.  
My lips part as I say "Noelle, we need to break up."  
She screams in pain at the words I spoke. Her small, fragile body collapses to the ground. This isn't any kind of pain I'm causing her, this is pure mental, spiritual. I'm breaking, literally breaking her. She can't. No, I can't love her. What am I feeling? Love? I need to figure that out, but for now, I'm leaving her, for her sake. I walk away, leaving her in the street, breaking harder than any piece of glass.  
(Out of daydream)  
To think, all of that happened because I simply couldn't fathom the mere idea of me being able to love anyone. Knowing I specifically love her, it's unbearable. Best friends before she and I started in 9th grade for us and ended her freshman year of college. I'm not one to love so quickly, so easily. That's the main reason I left her there in Lincoln Street breaking.  
Remembering how I broke her makes me numb somedays, while the others, my heart breaks and tears manage to escape my blue-grey-green eyes. Realizing my current state without her just hurts. I walk over to my closet. I look at my navy blue muscle t-shirt she used to steal from me and m dark blue skinny jeans. Her favourite outfit I'd only wear for her.  
I guess I'm wearing it because I'm meeting my assigned songwriter and I want to remind myself that no matter who I may come across, whatever girl I meet, I'm Noelle's, and that's all I want is her back, no matter how I broke her, I love her. I do. 

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
My drive this morning consisted of going to Starbucks, buying my normal Iced Carmel Machiatto, stopping by my old hometown cafe, Bj's, and getting to-go biscuits and gravy, and arriving at the studio I'll be working at with my assigned songwriter. My jaw clenches then unclench. I feel as my whole world will be flipped upside down the second I walk into the studio. I walk into the double doors to the studio and bump into a scarlet-red haired girl handling a Triple Mocha Frappuccino. I look at her and say "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, did I get any of it on you?"  
She moves her head and looks at me stammering "No, y-you d-i- Ryan? Ryan Scott?" I look at her and say "Noelle, I didn't...are you...are you my songwriter?" Before she gets the chance to answer, a man a little older than me says "Noelle, you've only been in this studio for half an hour and you are already bumping into your assigned artist." Her lips part as a scowl takes over her features. I say "Nice to meet you, Noelle, I'm Ryan." in a cocky tone.  
She rolls her brown eyes and says "You too, Ryan." My Noelle Evelyn Sawyer, working as my assigned songwriter, never would've guessed it. Not even with the old guitar, she kept in our place, or the millions of journals full of her past, slowly transforming into mesmerizing lyrics. She's made it big without me, and here I am, entering back into her life unintentionally. She backs up from me and stalks away.  
I ask the older man, "Who are you, sir?" He says "I'm Adam, Adam Blake, your new boss."  
My new boss?

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
Ryan James Scott? Are you kidding? No, I'm not working with him!  
I go to my room, number 8 in the studio, and walk in the soundproof room. My fingers go over my walls, the millions of "Ryan has broken me", and Ryan James Scott with an X over it. I bang my fists on the wall violently, not feeling the pain of my knuckles bleeding. Tears spill out my eyes.  
Just to my luck, I would have the person who broke me be over everything I do...right? In the midst of my crying, the doors open to reveal a brown-haired, grey-green-blue eyed boy I was once very familiar with. His eyes travel to my small bloody hands, and a look of worry takes over his features. He runs over to me and screams "Noelle!" I look over to see his body walking towards me.  
I back up, not wanting him to come near me. He says "Noelle, I'm not gonna hurt you." I yell "You already did once, just shut up and go away!" Pain attacks my heart before it even gets physical. He stammers "I-I know I did.", as my crying gets harder.  
I loved him, I did. He stood there, watching me break continually saying I didn't love him. He has broken me, hurt me, and destroyed me, yet here he is ready to clean up my bloody knuckles and simply walk back into my life like nothing happened between us, but it did.  
I look away and run out of the room, blood dripping to my wrist. I text Adam, "I'm sorry, had to go home, he was through for the day, and we aren't getting along." He replies "It's fine Noelle, I'm sure it'll get better, I'll see how to make you two get along." I clench my phone tightly, surprised it didn't shatter then leave the studio.  
How long is he supposed to be here? Why out of all people...him? Why him?

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I can't find her. Ever since my encounter with her for her as my assigned songwriter. I had no clue I'd break her that bad. Love destroys people. I find a girl who I suppose works here and ask her "Have you seen Noelle?"  
She replies "She must've left. Don't know why." I find Adam and say "Since you are my new boss, is there anything I don't know about? Is there any rules you specifically have for me as your client?" He looks at me and says "No dating a co-worker and don't even think or look at Noelle or things will get ugly."  
My jaw clenches at how her name rolls off his lips. I clench my fists and say "Why specifically N-Noelle?" He says "I've liked her, and grown close to her, the last thing that beautiful girl needs to worry about is another broken heart. Apparently her last destroyed and broke her horribly. I can tell. I can't let her get hurt again. Break the girl I've grown close to."  
I question "How close?" He says "Closer than I'll ever let you get to her." I say "Is that a threat?" He answers "Not a threat, just a warning." I ask "If she's been broken by a guy, then why in your right, overprotective mind would you hire a guy to work with her?"  
He shrugs, clearly knowing his reasoning behind why he did hire me. I question him again, louder with anger evident in my voice, "Why would you hire a guy to work with her?" He comes in close to my face and grips my chin harsh. He says "Ryan, if it was your concern, I hire guys to work with her to make her break more, she leans to me when she breaks." I shake my head disgusted and say "You love her only when she's breaking, only when she's in her most vulnerable state. How truly disgusting."  
He shrugs and calmly states "I love vulnerability, I can walk all over her and she just sees it as affection." I push him by his shoulders catching him off guard causing him to fall to the ground. I stand above him and say "I'm not gonna let you do that to her. She has been through so much, and I'm not letting you break her just to get the attention you want from her." He asks "How do you know how much she's been through?"  
I scream "I caused it! I broke her."

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
"I broke her!" left my lips. His mouth gapes open. He says with a smirk, "Me...disgusting? No, that must be you. Breaking a girl who truly loved you? You are the disgusting one."  
I say "No, you are the disgusting one because you see her vulnerability as a perk on your part." I walk out of the room and pull out my phone. I look to see the time. 6:35. I'm past the point of being mad.  
Using her vulnerability as walking all over her and letting her think it's love. I could love her better than that. I do love her more than that. He's a douche. Why would he use her?  
I may have left her broken, yeah, but using her, that is out of my power to do to her. I walk to the room I caught Noelle in, trying to gather my thoughts. My eyes wander to a few stains of her blood on the wall. She, Noelle Sawyer, is broken. Possibly beyond fixing.  
Maybe I can't fix her, but I will do my best when I get the chance. Maybe I won't get that chance, don't mean I won't work for it. I smell her perfume, her flowery-apricot, her scent, her natural scent. Tears threaten to escape my eyes. I'm aching for her.  
When I caught her in here, bloody knuckles, blood-red eyes, tears falling from her eyes, all I wanted to do was clean up her knuckles and hold her till she'd stop her crying, I'd rock her till she stopped letting her tears fall.  
She wouldn't even let me near her.  
She's scared to let me near her.  
Should I expect less?  
I did break her.  
I never would've dreamt this bad though.  
I can't see her anymore. I looked at her eyes and I see nothing. She is full of nothing. I look at her body and I don't see her body, I see walls, brick walls. I look at her heart, I don't see a heart that only beat for me, but one closed in a safe, far from me. She's guarding herself, from everyone...from me...

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I take a cold wet washcloth to my knuckles and wipe the blood off. I didn't even feel any pain. I'm getting worse. Why did he even try to come in my room? We are going to be artist-songwriter, but he had no reason, we weren't writing at that time.  
He just...I can't. I built up walls the second he left me. Now it's just me guarding myself. I've protected him, but he isn't gonna protect me. I refuse. He never even told me why he left me.  
He only left me because he kept denying that I loved him. He denied my love. He left me with no motives behind it. He was the cause of my destruction. He is my ruination.  
He changed who I was. All by denying true love.  
Love can ruin people.  
I walk to my closet and change into my black hoodie and purple short shorts. My knuckles open and I wince slightly.  
Back when I was his I would let him take care of me.  
Things change and so do people.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I drive home to my subtle apartment. My fists bang against the black walls repeatedly. I can't believe I broke her that bad. I ruined, broke, and destroyed the only girl I've ever loved. I loved her, only her, yet left her breaking in Lincoln Street with no mere reasoning behind it besides denying her true love towards me.  
I stop and breathe heavily. I can't protect her anymore, let alone go near her. She is fragile, literally horribly fragile. I broke her to mere fragility. I may be repeating "I broke her", but in my mind, thinking of her, that's all that comes to mind. I need to figure out how to break her walls, those brick walls, how to find the key she so harshly broke into various pieces to keep anyone from getting back into her heart as I did and to finally get those gorgeous brown eyes back to holding something, whether it's hatred or disgust, I don't care, just...something besides pure nothing.  
I also, probably in the meantime of that, need to show Adam's true colours and show her how truly disgusting he is. All she sees from his grossness is affection. When I get the chance, I will exploit him for who he truly is.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I wake up on the floor wondering what happened. I reach for my phone and call my brother. I groan and stammer "S-Sawyer?" He asks "Noelle, why are you calling me?" I say "I just wanted to talk to you."  
I wince and gasp slightly in the phone. He asks "Noelle, what did you do?" I say "I may have slightly punched a wall harsh and my knuckles split open and bleed." He yells "Noelle." I wince at his screaming and begin crying.  
I've managed to become sensitive to people yelling at me. His voice softens as he remembers my sensitivity to being yelled at as he says "Noelle, are you okay? I'm sorry I yelled." My voice muffles as I say "I'm not okay. I'm not." My brother, Noah Sawyer, has been my rock, he's been my best friend through everything.  
I've been able to tell him everything. He says quietly "What happened baby sis?" I stammer "R-Ry..." His voice gets slightly stern as he says "What about him?"  
My voice cracks as I stammer "H-He's back. He's my artist, my assigned artist. He's working with me."

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I reach for my phone and dial my brother. He and I were close, he also grew close to Noelle. His voice says "Ryan, what's up?" I stammer "N-Noelle." He asks "What about my Noelle?"  
I say "She's working with me, my songwriter, my assigned songwriter." He says "Oh, Lord, that's great. Ry babe and Noelle baby." My eyes swell with tears as I yell "I broke her!" He says "What?"  
I say "Colby, I broke her. I broke up with her freshman year of college and left her broken in Lincoln Street." He says "Oh, god. How's she?" I say "Broken, more than I know."

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I end the phone call with Noah. Tears were shed, but now I just feel numb. I wish I could just move. How long can I possibly handle him working there? I slip on my green converse he bought me and pull up my hair in a messy bun and drive to the studio.  
I'm not physically there to care about my appearance. I slam shut the door to my room and grab a pencil. I go through the various journals and find a black cover one and scribble down "I hate Ryan James Scott!" I hear a knock on the door and say "Come in." A pair of blue-grey-green eyes look at me and automatically look away.  
He says calmly "You, me, Bj's, 10 minutes, okay?" I say "No Ryan, I'm not going." A hand of his places itself on his left hip as he says stubbornly "You. Me. Bj's. 10 minutes. Okay!" I wince at his tone getting louder and say "Ryan, no."  
He says "Noelle, we need to talk." I say "Then why didn't we talk then? You left me breaking with no reason behind it." He walks closer to me and says "We need to talk. Bj's. 2 minutes. P-please?" I give in.  
He gets in his truck and me in my car. We arrive at the cafe in our hometown we used to go to all the time. I sit in one of the chairs across from him keeping as much distance from him as I can. I scowl at the date. February 23rd.  
The day we first got together. I walk to my car and open the glove compartment. Various notes, letters, and drawings lay in there. A purple box lays there and the hoodie he had bought me is in the back of the car. The only time I take out those items is on this date. It's the things he left me since he left me broken. I place the promise ring he bought me on my left ring finger, still fitting me perfectly. I slip my purple hoodie off my body and slip on the one he got me. His scent floods my nose.  
Tears brim my eyes and I carefully wipe them from my eyes with the cuffs. I reenter the restaurant and come inside to find that he's ordered our drinks. Me, a sweet tea, and him the same. I always ordered a sweet tea and he'd say "I'm gonna make you some sweet tea one day."  
He promised me he'd make me a lot of things, but now, that has clearly changed. I sit back down and fidget with the ring on my left ring finger. Only 8 months into this and we were madly in love and we knew it. Well, I guess that was just a lie. He never clearly believed me on my part of the love deal.  
I look up at his eyes and glance down quickly. I need to avoid talking to him at all costs. I can't let him get back into my heart and cause damage once again like he already has. His voice comes out small as he asks "Noelle?" I say nothing.  
He says "Noelle, I know you can hear me, I need to know something." I groan and say "What Scott? What would you like to know about me? More ways to get into my head and break me once again?" He adopts a pained look on his face as he says "Noelle, I don't want to hurt you."

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
"Noelle, I don't want to hurt you." leaves my lips. It may just be me, but at that moment in time, I feel her heart shatter further. How do those comforting words hurt her? I hear her voice say "What? What does Ryan Scott possibly want to know about his ex he left breaking?"  
I say "Noelle, d-do you still love me? Truthfully?" She says "Ryan, I don't know what love is. With you, I knew what love was. What true love was. When I broke, I lost myself. I lost love."  
I say "I think I may know what love is." I continue "Love is having this strange feeling in your stomach, and the feeling isn't something you can recognize and label as love." I feel her heartbeat slowly, not her heart in a safe, the heart I found a key for and managed to open up. She says "Love is wanting someone forever and ever. It's looking at someone for no reason, and laughing with them for no reason. It's loving someone forever no matter what."  
The waiter comes to take our orders. I say "Just something for the lady." A blush takes over her features. You never would've guessed just a few minutes ago her and I were fighting over coming here and talking. That I wouldn't be her boyfriend.  
Then the realization hits, and I come to my senses. I'm not her boyfriend, I'm not going to take her home, and cuddle her. I guess the hoodie I bought her, and promise ring on her left ring finger does bring me back. Old me. The me who broke her.  
I hate him! I look at her body, and notice the hoodie and smile slightly, she's wearing it. I want to reach for her hand, but I'm scared of her reaction.  
Will she run? Will she break? Will she forget about me? Will she forget our past, and hold my hand? Will she ever forgive me?  
I brush off the questions flooding my mind, and reach under the table for her left hand. My fingers come across cool metal. I rub my finger over it again and feel two rough patches. I know that feeling all too well, she's also wearing the promise ring.  
Her finger brushes my knuckles. It's a start I suppose. I say "Wanna know something?" A grin takes over her features as she nods. I continue "I spoke to Colby yesterday, and he still calls you his Noelle."  
She smiles and says "I was always fond of Colby, I think I had to be, after all, I'd rather deal with 2 Scott's than 1." Realizing how she's acting. I'm still her weakness. Her amnesia on top of that. She's forgotten about her anger towards me, and for this moment we are 2 best friends, in our hometown restaurant, waiting to have our food whilst talking about our lives.  
I'm just dreading what's gonna happen when this stops.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I remember Colby, Ryan's older brother. He was very hot, and always a flirt. I got some of my flirting skills from him I suppose. He used to call me 'His Noelle', and my Ryan would groan and tell him to shut up. He'd get jealous.  
Then again, I suppose we both got jealous. Knowing what I'm doing has to end eventually, but I want this moment to last. Being mad at him does get hard. I need this. He says "Noelle, I miss you."  
I say quietly "I miss you, Ry. But you broke me, and I need proof you're not gonna hurt me again. I seriously can't take another broken heart." He says "Noelle, I have something to tell you." I say "Yeah?" He says "Adam. He isn't how he seems."  
I question "How so?" He says "You breaking, you go to him, he sees it as vulnerable, and he walks all over you, and lets you see it as affection." A disgusted expression moves over my features. I actually thought he did like me truly. This faker!  
I cry hard. He looks at me and stammers "N-Noelle, I-I d-didn't..." I get up and hug him while he is in his seat. He softens in my embrace. He says "Shh...shh...it's alright, I'm here." I say "Ry, he used me." He gets up and says "Shh...not here."  
Before we leave, he pays for our drinks. We exit and I cry harder against his shoulder. I was starting to let him in. Let him get as close to me as I let Ryan get to me before. His hands press to the small of my back.  
Truthfully, this hurts more than when Ryan broke me. What am I supposed to do now? I'm not going back. I let him in only to find out he is using me for my vulnerability.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
We stand outside Bj's. Her body trembling with violent sobs. He used her. My new boss used my ex-girlfriend for his pleasure. Sought pleasure from her vulnerability.  
My fingertips brush against her spine as she shifts closer to my body. I run my fingers through her hair. I missed this. Her breaking and I'd hold her. I whisper "Shh...shh beautiful, he can't hurt you while I'm here."  
A sniffle comes from her. I wouldn't hurt her while she's vulnerable. I made a promise I wouldn't hurt her while she's in her vulnerable state. Tears stream from her eyes while she doesn't break as violently as she was before. I study her moves as the day I did when I lost her.  
Her hair blows into her face as tears stream down her face. She is as broken as she was when I broke her. D-dare I say, worst. He must've gotten her bad. I look at her and say "Shh...Noelle."  
She looks at me and says "Ryan, why, why did he do this to me? Of all people?" I look at her and say "For his pleasure. His gain. He wanted to use you for your vulnerability."  
Her arms reach for my waist to pull my body to her. I touch her hands and bring them to rest on my chest and she moves closer to me and rests her head on my chest. I watch her body cave in mine as she whispers"Ry, would you hurt me like that?" I say softly "Would I hurt you like that if I told you to prevent you from getting hurt?" I hear her voice come small but still say "Ry, what will happen between us now?"  
I ask "What do you want to do from this?" She stammers "B-be y-yours a-again." I ask "Are you sure?" She nods. I ask "Noelle Sawyer, will you do me the honours of being my girlfriend again?"  
She answers the question with a small kiss pressed to my lips.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
My lips press smoothly to his. Restarting on the day we started. I open my eyes as my lips pull from his, and I rest my forehead on his. He says "Noelle, I know we both can't forget about the day we broke up, but when you want to know the real reason I left you, I'll tell you." I say "Not now Ry."  
He just brings me to him and sighs hard. He has missed us, our holding each other and simply enjoying each others essence.  
He says "Noelle, I promise I'm not leaving you." I say "Ry babe, I'm not losing you again."  
February 23rd, the day we got together, the day we broke up being April 23rd and the day we start, the day we restart.  
We walk back to the restaurant and see our sweet tea's refreshed and our food freshly cooked. I swear the cooks have a thing for us. They always liked us. Back when we were 8, and best friends bringing each other breakfast, to now 22 years old and having a date in our favourite renowned restaurant. His hand rests on mine as a smile spreads across my face.  
I say "Ry?" He says "Yes." I ask "What do we do about Adam though?" He says "Eat. Then later tonight we will talk more on that subject."  
I cut into the steamy biscuit and take a bite. I've never had a bad experience with the food here. It's always so peaceful in a loud manner. I pull the long-sleeves to cover my hands after I put down the fork. It isn't awkward with him, it's indescribable.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I look at her brown eyes softening in my gaze. What happens next for us? We have to find out what to do about Adam. I'm not letting him use her anymore. Even if that does mean losing my job.  
She says "Ry, what's on that mind of yours?" I say "Noelle, he can't use you anymore. What happens after today?" She says "R, he won't, you'll protect me, I know you will. After this, we see how we go from there. Just don't forget our motto."  
I reply "I'll keep loving you and you'll keep loving me and the rest will fall into place."  
She smiles and laughs. She doesn't laugh a fake laugh, it's sweet and body racking, it's her genuine laugh. I've loved that motto. Not just because I found it and dedicated it to is, but because it is truly us.  
She asks "What about our jobs?" I ask "Should we pretend this didn't happen?" She says "No, should I make a scene?" I say "Noelle, that sounds merely perfect." She grins and says "Planning, my favourite thing to do when it comes to us."  
She used to plan our whole future together. She loved it. I loved watching her.  
She asks "How should it go Ry?" I say "You could come in the room and pretend to be hurt by me." She says "Oh Ryan, why'd you have to break me again?" and winks at me. I say "Perfect Angel."  
She blushes at the nickname she's fond of.  
I say "Watch how he acts, but don't let him know you are faking till I walk in on it."  
Knowing him, he'll get her to come to his office and "comfort" her in there. Truly disgusting he is.  
She says "Ok my Ry." I ask "So, you know what to do right, Noelle?"  
She nods and tears up.  
I ask "Noelle, what's wrong?" She says "I just still can't believe he used me. Why is my vulnerability a weakness for me?"  
I say "Because your past Noelle has made you this vulnerable, fragile, broken girl. It has ruined you and no matter how hard you try to fix yourself, you can't. You, babe, are always gonna be vulnerable, fragile, and broken. You just need to be fixed." By the time I end my harsh yet true statement, tears are streaming down her face and her body is tight in mine shaking with violent sobs.  
She's so fragile in my arms and I'm holding her trying not to let her fall and break into pieces. I say "Shh...shh baby." Her hands rest on my chest and I say "Noelle...guess what." She sniffles and says "What!" excitedly. My "guess what's" were always the thing to make her excited.  
I stammer "I-I l-love y-you..." A hard kiss from her attacks my lips. I never said that to her, not even when we were dating, all because I didn't know I felt love towards her. She giggles and says "I love you, Ry."

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
He actually said I love you to me. He never said that to me while we were dating. "I love you's" are a big milestone in any relationship, but you can look over it. This one, I can't. He actually said it. That's major.  
Not for us, but for him. He's never said "I love you" to his family, friends, or even his exes so that makes me, Noelle Sawyer, the first person he's ever said "I love you" to. He smiles big. I know my babe, I know he is changing, by that first "I love you" to roll off his lips.  
Maybe this will get better. 

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
Noelle Sawyer, the first person I've ever said "I love you" to. She's changing me. I ask "Baby, what's going on in that beautiful mind of yours?" A giggle leaves her lips at the compliment as she says "You are changing. Ry. I don't know who's changing you, but you are changing. The "I love you", "baby", everything."  
I say " I know baby." She looks at me and asks "Ry?" I nod and say "Yes baby?" She asks "Why are you changing?" I shrug and mutter "Because of you darling, you make me want to be better for you."  
A smile plays on her lips. She's loving this. But, I'm not telling her any of this to play with her, it's just the truth. She's the first and only person I've ever truly loved. Truly...loved.  
I love her.  
Now, onto worrying about stupid Adam. 

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I go home from the restaurant and don't even bother changing. I slip into my bed after taking off my shoes and lay there. It's been a big day. I got him back and managed to learn everyone isn't as they truly seem.  
What would happen next?  
I have to expose Adam to my vulnerable eyes.  
A tear escapes my eyes, I've had someone use me once before, and not for good reason. I lost something...that I'll never be able to get back. For that, I've been ruined and destroyed. My reputation is lost and my heart has been guarded.  
I've been talked about, spread rumours about, and plenty more. I've only had 1 true girlfriend before Ryan. I'm not who I used to be by any means.  
By any means.  
I pull out my phone and text Ryan "Ry, what happens now?" He replies with, "Whatever you can think of, mostly good, but probably bad too." I begin to shake and text back "You are going to destroy my life again h-huh?" He replies "No. I'm not gonna do that ever again baby. You'll possibly lose your job...maybe even be threatened a lot, but I'm not going to destroy your life ever again baby."  
I quickly reply "Night Scotty."  
He replies "Night Sawyer."

*flashback* (Ryan's P.O.V.) *flashback*  
I put on my navy blue muscle t-shirt and a pair of jeans. A grin appears on my face from the other times I've come to church with her. We are both holy tryers yet saviours to the other.  
She's my saving grace and I'm her saviour.  
My dad drives me to the church and they are always in the basement. I walk down to the basement and as always, a pair of baby brown eyes catch mine by the same girl I'm being saved by. I get a load of "hello's" and sit next to her. Her hand rubs my shoulder and she lays her head on the table. I put my arm next to her head as she nuzzles her head against my arm.  
She's sleepy...  
I feel it.  
I watch as my head lays against the table and she sits back up. She tries to pay attention and glances over at me carefully. She studies my moves and rubs her hand on my arm.  
*out of flashback*  
Ever since then, I was banned from coming to church with her.  
Her family hated me. For no reason. I won't forget all the things we've done there, all our memories. She's always been beautiful, even in her youth. She's also been my saving grace for quite some time on top of that. I've never loved someone as I have her and I'd do anything for that silly, cute, adorable red-haired girl. Even if it meant losing everything I've worked hard to get, I'd still do anything. I love her.  
I look at my phone and see the time at 9:15. I have work with her in 30 minutes. I grab my phone and send her a quick text stating "Biscuits and gravy with sweet tea and a Red Velvet Frappuccino on the way, then maybe we'll go for a light lunch and some shopping later?" She replies "Sounds delicious. That sounds perfect, on to Adam...wish me luck." I say "All your luck is right here. Good luck baby."

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I receive a text from Ryan stating "All your luck is right here. Good luck baby." and a smile takes over my features.  
I think back to when I and Ryan would fight. I hear Ryan's voice plain as day saying "I'm done." Tears escape my eyes at the memory of him giving up on me.  
Adam walks by me in the hallway and comes closer towards me. Trying to fake sympathy he says "What happened to you, Noelle? Did h-he hurt you?" All I can do is make out a nod.  
It hurts remembering the day I lost him.  
The day he gave up on us.  
He walks me in his office and lays on his couch in his office. I play into his game and lay in between his legs laying my head on his chest crying harder. He says "Baby? What did he do?" I say "He brought up when we were d-done and said he's q-quitting because of m-me..." I head a knock on the door as he says "Come in!" as if everyone is used to this.  
Is everyone in on his "using me" game?  
The door opens to reveal a brown haired cutie I've fallen for again as he looks in my tear-stained eyes.  
Everyone is in on his game and he sees my vulnerability as a way to show him affection because he's needy because he doesn't have him a girl in love with him.  
Disgust quickly takes over Ryan's features as I know he knows what Adam is doing to me.  
Ryan says "Stop using her Adam!"  
Adam replies "It's not like you are any better than me. You did break her after all."  
Ryan grabs my hand and says "Noelle, he's using you."  
I say nothing.  
Ryan repeats "Styles, he's using you."  
My mind flashes to all the time billions of times I thought he was loving me and he was instead using me for my vulnerability.  
From that moment my mind goes blank.  
Where am I? Who is the brown-haired boy who knows my name? What am I doing here?  
I ask the brown-haired boy "Who are you?" 

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
My heart breaks at my girl.  
I say "Noelle, it's me, Ryan, your boyfriend. Don't you remember me?" She shakes her head no.  
A tear threatens to escape my eyes. Did she forget me? F-Forget us?  
Adam walks towards her and says "Noelle? Do you know where you are?" My jaw clenches as I push Adam by his shoulders away from her.  
I know his tricks, he's trying to sit there and get her to him.  
I mutter "Stay back Adam." He walks to me and pushes me back by my shoulders.  
Shortly before I know it, my Noelle has run away, and my fist has collided with Adam's jaw way too many times to count. He must be stronger than I thought because he's slightly bleeding. Every time he tries to throw a blow at me, he never gets the chance because I throw a blow to his jaw.  
What's going through her mind?  
Does she know who she is?  
Does she know she's mine?

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
There are only a few things in which I know.  
I know I'm Noelle and I know I'm in a situation in which 1 guy, his name is Ryan I think, is fighting for me to stay away from this A-Adam guy.  
I'm sitting in a coffee shop staring at my phone contacts.  
Who is this "My Savior" with an open white heart and a black heart?  
I dial the number and I'm immediately greeted with a voice I heard hours prior.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I greet Noelle on the phone with a shy hello.  
I don't know why this happened but I know it's mental and it's breaking my heart seeing and hearing my girl like this.  
Her voice stammers in the question "R-Ryan?" I say "Yeah?" She asks "Why is your name on my phone 'My Savior' with an open white heart and a closed black heart?"  
My heart skips a beat at my name in her phone. She kept it like that.  
I stammer "Meet me at B-Bj's...oops sorry, I'll just come to pick you up." She questions "Why and how do you know where I live?"I say "Just, allow me to reintroduce myself when I get there okay?" She answers "Okay, bye!" in an overly giddy tone.  
She's lost it all. Her past, everything. This is the chance of a lifetime, I can reintroduce myself and correct my mistakes with her in the...I mean our beginning.  
I leave the room and go to her assigned room. Lately, I've been sleeping here. Given the fact that her closet contains some of my clothes.  
I attempt to quickly change into a red t-shirt and black skinnies. My legs carry me to my Ford truck, and I drive to her apartment. My eyes take in the beautiful complex laced with an apartment here and there. Hers is by far the most stunning one. I arrive at her flat and get out of my truck. I knock on the door softly and hear her small voice say "Come in!" with her old cheery voice.  
I've missed hearing her like this. I know it's cliche due to the fact she has amnesia, but her being how she was before everything, is everything to me.  
I open the door to reveal my red-haired beauty in a pair of purple skinnies and a black t-shirt. She giggles as she sees me and says "This shirt was randomly in my closet so I put it on and these purple skinny jeans." Little does my beauty know that the shirt she's wearing is one of my old tees. She smiles and twirls around saying "These skinnies are already my favourite." Just like her old self. A blush takes over her features and she says "Ryan?" I get eager and say "Yes Noelle?" She says "Do I flirt?" I respond "Yes, but never when you first meet someone. You've just met me so by now you'd be shy and curious about me." She stammers "Oh o-ok."  
We jump in my Ford truck and drive to the restaurant I'm in love with. We find an open table and sit there.  
She smiles brightly and says "So...my name is Noelle. What's yours?" I say "Ryan Scott. And your last name is Styles, love." A giggle escapes her lips and she says "Nice to meet you, Ryan Scott." I say "The pleasure's all mine, Noelle Styles." She says shyly "So what am I like?"  
My face brightens at the question. What my Noelle is like. Where do I begin on what my Noelle is like?  
I state "You are beautiful and cocky. Smart, charming and a flirt like a loving God. Challenging, relentless, talented, determined, loving, caring, terrific personality, friendly and super outgoing. And you a...were mine." She looks at the ground "Was yours?" I nod as tears threaten to blur my vision. Her heart sinks at my words and she says "I'm sorry."  
She's still sensitive, still my girl.  
I attempt a smile and say "Don't worry, we'll get her back. I promise." She looks at her left ring finger where her promise ring rests. She asks "What is this?" as she slides off the ring. I say "The promise ring I got you." Her eyes light up and a beautiful, stunning smile takes over her features. "It's beyond gorgeous." I smile and say "Just l-like you."  
A blush takes over her features as she smiles. Her smile is pure radiant. I've missed her old smile. The way her lips shape to form such beauty is a mystery to me. She looks up at me and places a small kiss on my cheek.  
She's gonna become my best friend again. I smile and my cheeks flush. So now we are retrying our friendship, and I have a full new shot at our first time as boyfriend and girlfriend. She's happier since that happened. Since everything changed for her.  
She forgot about her past, she's a whole new person because of that. She'll never be the same and it appears to me that I'm going to have to make her remember who she used to be. She's never gonna be who she was after everything because I'm going to prevent her from that. I-I hope I can prevent her from that.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I'm staring a the promise ring Ryan gave his Noelle. It's beautiful. He must've truly loved her.  
I look up from the ring and ask "You l-loved h-her?" He looks at the ground ashamed. He says "Want the full, honest story, or the current?" My eyes light up as I say "The full, honest story." He says "You may want to wipe that look off your face, it's not a happy story."  
A frown takes over my features and I hear his voice say "We were friends our whole life, eventually best friends lead to more than just friends and we were fortunate enough to get to that. I dated her for at least 5 years and I, being young and new at me and her, decided I'd break up with her. I denied her true love to me and ended up breaking her. I lost her for a long time and ended up watching her make herself better without me. I one day got a call from Adam Blake, out of the blue, asking me if I'd like to be one of his clients on an artist deal. He said he heard my 2 previous albums and my voice sounded like money."  
I smile and say "You must've said yes since you got together with your Noelle." He nods and says "I did, of course, I had to kill myself for weeks before I got her back."  
I say "The people we wait for end up being the ones we love."

*flashback* (Ryan's P.O.V.) *flashback*  
I smile brightly at Noelle, her straight-red hair messily falling in her face while her laughter fills the room.  
She says "You are gonna save me Ry." I blush and push the stray hairs out of her eyes as I say "Every time, always." Tears quickly brim her eyes. I ask "What's wrong Styles?" She shoves back her tears and says "Nothing." I say "Tell me, please." She says "It's...just a bad flashback from my stupid past." My eyes flash at her, letting her know she can still tell me. She continues "H-he...one afternoon, I was..." she pauses and scowls starting again "disobeying him. He literally told my mom and agreed to tear my bed down so I could sleep on the freezing cold floor next to a blank wall."  
My eyes tear up. I hate him for hurting her. She deserved so much better and on top of that, she didn't deserve any of that.  
I say "Noelle Evelyn Styles, sleeping on the cold ground. I should've knocked him out." She laughs lightly and says "He deserved it, in the long run. Took away something I'll never be able to get back, left me hungry..." she stops and shudders as she says "made me a housewife when I was only 11." Her eyes focus on the ground, out of my gaze. I place my hand on hers as she looks up and says "I literally was a housewife at 11, cleaning my end of the places we stayed, doing the dishes forcibly, everything I could've been doing was put on hold, could've been back home, seeing my friends, living happily. Whatever happened to her? To younger me?"  
*end of flashback*  
Tears are coming down my face. That sicko put her through that, making my girl a housewife. At 11. I wouldn't have been shocked if he abused her. I know he damaged her confidence. Told her that her sister could sing better than her. Told her the wrong things about her body. Cut down her belief in herself. At such a young age he damaged her confidence, morals, values, strength and dignity.  
Noelle says "Ryan? Hey, Scott" Hey you there?" I quickly wipe my tears and say "Sorry, just, what were you saying?" She asks "Why'd you zone out?" I say "Don't worry about it." She says "Ry...please tell me." I say "You...My Noelle had a traumatic past." Her eyes dart to the ground as she shuts her eyes and whimpers. She quickly states "Umm...I have to go." as she leaves.  
What did I do?

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I exit the restaurant and scroll through my contacts, I decide on texting "Bro Styles" and state "Can you come to drop me off at my place, I'm at Bj's. X Noelle."  
"My Noelle has a traumatic past" is scattering all through my happy thoughts. What could he mean by that?  
The person responds with "Why are you at Bj's Styles? Did you forget where you live? Hold on we will talk when I arrive. X Noah."  
Noah? Who's Noah?  
Shortly after the text sent, a black Range Rover pulls in front of me and the window rolls down as a light brown-haired boy with blue eyes and a bit of stubble comes into view saying "Come in Noelle. I'm going to bring you home and then we can talk." I get in and question him "Noah?" He says "Yes." I say "Nothing."  
In the midst of silence, he reaches into his CD holder and puts in a CD, it doesn't have anything wrote on it.  
A British voice starts saying "Make a little conversation." as Noah starts singing to every word.  
Noah's a good singer. The song ends and I haven't spoken a word.  
Noah nudges me with his hand and says "What's wrong Styles? That is your favourite song." I say "It is? I mean. I know." He says "What's gotten into you? First, you text me to drop you off at your flat at...where were you...oh yeah...Bj's! The place you and..." he stops as his jaw clenches as he continues "him love. Then you don't sing your favourite song and pretend as if you don't know me." I yell at him "Noah...or whoever you are...don't yell at me I know...I was at Bj's ok. Ryan wanted to introduce me to him and I found out about his Noelle..." He cuts me off and yells "He reintroduced his self to you? His Noelle?" I cower down and say "Who are you?" His lips form a frowns as he says "I'm Noah. Your umm...brother." I say "You...you are my brother? How do I know you are my brother and not a liar?"  
He purses his lips into a tight line and pulls up his sleeve to reveal a small red Batman symbol and our last name below it.  
He says "My red-haired batgirl always won my heart, just by being my baby sister." I laugh and say "You must be. Why don't you like Ryan? He's hot and very sweet and loving and caring." He yells "He hurt you!... He hurt my little sister. He broke her. She loved him. Truly loved him and he left her on Lincoln Street breaking with no clue as to why he was leaving her other than denying her true love." Tears stream down my face as I say "No, he's never hurt me, he was sweet and he fought for me." Noah says "He...h-he, he's trying to have a new first chance with his new Noelle..." to where I can barely hear it. I say "What?" He shuffles and says "He's trying to protect her. Keep her from becoming who she was before. Keep her as young and pure as she was so she won't have all of that hanging on her, weighing her down."  
I look at him in confusion at his mutters, I don't understand. Ryan...protecting me to make sure I'm not who his Noelle was before...who was his Noelle and what is he hiding from me about her?

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
Tears stream down my face as I drive to the studio. I arrive and enter the double doors as I carry myself to her assigned room. I throw a blow to the wall opposite hers stained with blood and scream "What did I do now!?"  
My lips purse against the wall after I calm down and I hear my conscious say "She'll text you. I promise."  
My heart breaks. I don't know why she'll text me, just that she will.  
Shortly after, my phone lights up with 'My Fallen Angel' texting me.  
Noelle sent me a text.  
I look at it stating "Who is your Noelle and what are you hiding from me about her. I'm at Noah's when you want to talk, but till then I'm done."  
She's done? I was the one who was done.  
I text her "There are so many things I can't tell you." with my Noelle's blood coursing through my veins. She fires back "Why not? You are trying to make me her! Make me YOUR Noelle!" I reply "You want to be broken, traumatized, and destroyed, fine, I'll be there in 5 with the first journal she ever kept, you can read it or not, but I didn't break YOU. YOU broke yourself."  
I rummage around her room looking for where this girl...my girl...keeps her journals. I find a bookshelf and see different spiral notebooks lined up.  
Those have to be it.  
I pick the first one up and look at the date. Jan 1, 2014.  
Perfect, early in her youth and about to get to the past which will destroy her.  
If she wants to destroy herself, that's her choice, but I protected her.  
But if she's gonna read, she's bound to break again.  
Do I keep her from breaking?

(Noelle's P.O.V.) ((NEED TO WRITE FULLY EVENTUALLY))  
His texts last words go through my mind on repeat.  
"You can read it or not, but I didn't break YOU. YOU broke yourself."  
I will break myself? M-my past is that bad to where I will break myself if I read it? What does he mean by that?  
I look at Noah's door and my heart breaks just for a small second. The second he will walk through that door, his hands are going to hold the one thing that is going to end up breaking me.  
Noah looks at me with a sympathetic look and his lip begins to quiver. I look at him and say "Styles, what's wrong?" He says "I just, I can't believe...how did this even happen?"  
As soon as he finishes his statement, Ryan walks in the door with a black spiral notebook in his hands. I look over the item as if it were the most sacred thing in the world to me. He hands it over to me carelessly as my fingertips run over the material beneath my fingertips. He walks away in disgust at me admiring the notebook.  
I open to the first page with a title of January 1st, 2014 and begin to read.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I pull out my phone and call Kam. I say "Kam, we have 3 problems, Noelle..." He cuts me off and says "Has lost her memory and don't remember who she was before. Yeah, I already know that Ry." I stammer "H-How did you..." He cuts me off again and says "Noah called me, he's worried about her and he wanted to tell me because he knows that you wanted to reintroduce yourself to her. Not a good thing by the way Ry." I say "Noah's always hated me so that's nothing new, but he called you? I thought he hated you because you are related to the 'boy that broke his little sister's heart'."  
He says "No, he doesn't hate me anymore now that we have a common goal. Protecting new Noelle and maybe getting her memories back." I say "Kam, we need to get my Noelle back, maybe not all of the bad memories and burdens and various regrets, but her old self back."  
I pout at the thought of not having her in my arms as I should right now.  
She should be mine but instead, she's standing there reading that...notebook. She should be laying there in my arms telling me how much she loves and needs me and how much her past has shaped her into the horrible being she may become.  
He says "But...I know your other two worries are her kid she adopted and her breaking because I know you just handed her one of your Noelle's spiral notebooks." I say "How'd you know that?" He says "Noah texted me." I say "You two are seemingly getting along great huh?" He says "It's about his baby sister and my best friend Ryan, you have to put that into perspective."  
I scowl "It's about my girlfriend, Kam." He says "Ry, chill, if you were her boyfriend, she'd be in your arms instead of reading the book YOU brought her." My jaw clenches at his words as I say "Kam, I brought her that so she wouldn't leave me. She literally said she was done if I didn't bring her one so what choice do I have any more? She's hard-headed and stubborn and she's the old Noelle she was before all of that."  
I think back to Hardin.  
She took one look at the small boy and fell in love. She knew she wanted to be his mom. Then the day I left, I walked home and said "Hardin, you are going to come to live with me. Is that what you want?" and his voice replied "Yes daddy." We walked out of the apartment her and I shared, and I left with tears running down my face.  
I brought him to Kam's flat and he automatically connected with Kam, so I left him there. Of course, me being his dad, I didn't let him stay there with Kam, but I did let him sleepover with his Uncle Kam. We had our own little flat and I knew I couldn't let him stay with her. Not that she was in a wrong, bad mindset, but because she was broken and I didn't want him to be the one thing caught up in the middle of it all. I didn't want him to think of me as the monster she thought of me as.  
I'd come to Kam's and bring him with me and I and Kam would talk while Hardin would sit there and listen to Kam as he read various novels. I wonder if she ever wondered how he was or even cared about him. Don't get me wrong, she is bound to care about him, but she wasn't there to take care of him.  
I had to take care of him and as much as that wasn't a problem, I didn't want to do it alone.  
I didn't want to be alone.  
The corners of my mouth twitch into a smile and I text Kam "Hey K, could you possibly bring Hardin here? Tell him his daddy has a huge surprise for him." He replies "Yeah, may I ask what you need him for and what your plan is on this?" I say "Kam, I'm thinking maybe if I bring Hardin to see her, maybe, just maybe, all of her memories will come back." He isn't there but I still know he is smiling at the thought of having his, my, everyone's Noelle back.  
Time to attempt to get my Noelle back.

(Kam's P.O.V.)  
I look over at Hardin in my lap trying to read the title of Wuthering Heights. His tiny voice stammers "W-w-wifering h-hets." I say "Good job Har, you are doing amazing, your dad will be so proud of you." He says "What about mum?"  
My facial expression drops. I always knew he was going to end up asking me about her, but not this early.  
I say "H, your dad has a huge surprise for you, and I think it has a big deal of your mum in it. If that's okay with you, I'd love to show you your surprise, but I can't tell you what it is." He nods eagerly and attacks me with a hug and says "Let's go see my daddy, Uncle Kam."  
I smile and go to my truck and put Hardin in his car seat up front with me and I get in the driver's seat and drive to Noah's flat. I look over at Hardin and he says "Uncle Kam?" I say "Yes love?" He says "Why did daddy leave mummy?" I say "She wanted to spend the night with Mila and Ocean." He says "And never come back?" I say "She wanted to come back all the time and come see you." I smile as we arrive at his flat thankful that we finally arrived other than still driving with a cute little intimidator named Hardin. I get him out of the truck and put my big hand in his small one making sure to look carefully before we cross the road.  
I bring him to his dad and say "Look it's daddy." His little feet run to Ryan and I smile. Ryan always was a great dad without Noelle, imagine how much better he is going to be with her.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I smile and look at the tiny thing holding on to my legs.  
He's, hold on.  
He's...  
I stammer "H-Hardin?"  
He says "Mum!"  
I look around and try to find my boyfriend. Where is Ryan? We got back together and now I can't find him. I look at his hoodie on my body and my favourite pair of skinny jeans on me. He says "Mum. Let's go see daddy."  
I say "Yes baby, let's go see daddy." Where is Adam? Is Adam here? I feel my whole body tense up and my walls build up at the thought of him being here. He can't be here.  
I feel a small hand grab mine leading me to Ryan. All of my memories are back. Ryan's going to be so happy. We reach Ryan and a smile takes over my features at the thought of how he is going to realize that I got all my memories back. I think back to the day we got together and what clothes he was wearing. I remember that shirt and those jeans like it was yesterday. Ryan says "Hey Noelle." in a depressed tone. I can't believe how upset me losing my memories was for him. I say "Hello my red t-shirt, dark holey blue jeans boyfriend of going to be longer than the 2 years in which we broke up after." He picks me up and hugs me and swings me around in his arms. I'm back. I'm finally me again.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I look at her as my eyes gleam with happiness.  
I missed her. I missed MY Noelle.  
She says "Ry babe. How bad was I?"  
Tears swell up in my eyes. I don't feel as if I could ever tell her the full story of the Noelle I witnessed first hand and how she so desperately wanted to be the Noelle I fell in love with, scars and all. I wanted to protect her from being my babe, my Noelle, make her another version of the girl I fell in love with, without all the scars and baggage she carried around with her wherever she went.  
I say "Baby, it was bad..." She says "I won't force you to tell me everything, I'm going to ask you tell me everything, but you don't have to if you don't want to. I won't force you to tell me something you don't want to tell me."  
That's how it should be between us, but there should also be no secrets between us.  
I look up at her and say softly to Hardin "Har, let's go back to Uncle Kam's and him and you can go have a playdate. How does that sound?" His eyes light up at me and he says "Okay daddy. Mummy owes me a playdate too." She says "Baby, I'll give you as many play dates as you want, but first, you and Uncle Kam can have one and I'll pick you up when Y'all are done with the playdate around 12 ish and we can go have lunch together okay baby?" He nods at her and smiles as he responds with the purest words to fall off his lips: "Okay mum. I love you." A tear threatens to leave her eyes as she says "I love you Hardin, more than you will ever imagine."  
Kam walks over to us and smiles as he takes Hardin's hand and says "Let's go continue our playdate shall we Har?" Hardin looks up at him and says "Can you read me a chapter of Pride and P-pr..." Kam cuts him off and says "Pride and Prejudice, it would be an honour. I never asked you who your favourite character was H. Who's your favourite? Is it Darcy or Elizabeth?" He says "Darcy!"  
Her eyes light up at the mention of her favourite character. She's always fallen for the bad boy yet soft babe characters, not excluding Hardin Scott from After, Heathcliff from Wuthering Heights and so many more. That was her, the books made her who she was. Not only did I save her, but the books did too.  
I look up at her and smile saying "Let's go home, shall we? We have a lot to talk about including the Noelle I witnessed." She intertwines her fingers with mine and says "Let's go talk babe."  
She's back.  
My Noelle is back.  
What happens now?

(Kam's P.O.V.)  
I smile at the 2 and 1/2-year-old in my passenger seat. He has his mum back and his dad has finally had the love of his life return to him after everything that has happened. He says "Kam Kam?" I reply "Yes love?" He says "Mummy wuvs daddy a lot doesn't she?" I nod and say "Yes Hardin." He says "She reminds me of Tessa and daddy reminds me of Hardin." I ask "How so?"  
Hardin has always been a bright kid. He's a lot smarter than he lets on and it may be because of the fact that I did read various classic novels to him so his vocabulary is very wide, but he gets some of it from his dad. Behind that punk star, prep ish attitude is a nerdy dork at heart that loves a good classic novel just like his son.  
He says "He's such a good dad to me kinda like how Hardin is with Smith even though they are half brothers. And mummy is Tessa because of her caring loving ways and her various instincts."  
I look at the kid in awe, he understands books at his age that other kids have no clue how to begin on comprehending.  
We arrive at my flat. I take him out of the truck and put him on the floor next to my big bookshelf as I walk to my room and change into a different shirt and shorts. By the time I come back in there he has Pride and Prejudice in his small hands and he is looking at the maroon material on the cover. I don't know whether Wuthering Heights or Pride and Prejudice is his favourite.  
I say "Ready to read the next chapter of Pride and Prejudice?" He nods and smiles and says "Yes Uncle Kam."  
We begin to read and in the middle of one of Elizabeth's lines, Noelle comes through the door with a big smile plastered across her face. I say "Hey Noelle, is it time for you to go take my precious little nephew from me?" Hardin giggles as a smile takes over his features. Noelle replies "Yes K, I do have to take my handsome son from you, but don't worry, tomorrow he can come over and have a play date with you."  
Hardin smiles and looks over at me. Noelle has a lunch planned for the two of them, then they are going to go back to Ryan's apartment they used to share and go read Pride and Prejudice.  
She looks at him and says "Ready to go eat with mummy?" He nods as his little stomach growls. She takes his smaller hand in hers and says "Where do you want to go eat love?" He says "I don't know, you want to pick mum?" She says "How about we go eat at me and daddy's favourite restaurant. How does that sound?" He says "Ok mummy, I'm gonna kiss Uncle Kam bye-bye and then go with you."  
He walks over to me and softly presses his lips to my cheek.  
She says "Want to go Hardin?"  
He nods and puts his tiny hand in hers. I watch as they leave my flat as Noelle pecks my cheek and says "Thank you, Kam, for taking care of him with Ry." I say "My pleasure, he's bright and very cheeky like his dad, but he also has the love for novels like you."  
Hardin is just like Noelle and Ryan.  
Speaking of Ryan...

(Adam's P.O.V.)  
I look around Noah's flat for Noelle. She told me when we were together long ago that this was a place I could find her when she was lost and trust me she is more than lost right now and that horrible boyfriend of hers...Ryan...don't even need to be near her right now.  
I go up to Noah and say "No, where's Noelle, I've been looking for her wanting to talk to her." Noah grabs me and pushes me back by my shoulders saying "Adam Blake, what do you want from my little sister."  
Ryan must've told him about our little talk.  
I say "I just wanted to find her and tell her we have to get out the photoshoot for Ryan by tomorrow." His jaw clenches as his eyes darken as he becomes completely fueled by his hatred towards me and his adrenaline and he says "I know that's not what you want out of her, you may have fooled her in the past, and she may be completely clueless about what your motives are towards her, but I've noticed a lot more things about you." He pushes his chest up and continues "Your motives aren't right. Neither are your intentions. You only seek to have her for your pleasure and as much as Ryan has broken my baby sister, he is better for her than you ever will be."  
He throws a blow to my jaw and I look at him and attempt to throw a blow to his stomach and he dodges it.  
He's as good as Ryan when it comes to fighting.  
I look at Noah and stand there scowling at him. I hate the fact that they both know now, how am I going to get Noelle to be mine. Next thing I know, I'm going to end up getting a restraining order by her or Noah or Ryan.  
I throw a blow to Noah's jaw and he falls straight on his back, a groan leaving his lips.  
He says "You know what, go ahead, hurt me, I'd so much rather you hurt me than hurt my baby sister or Ryan." 

(Noah's P.O.V.)  
I give up fighting Adam.  
He's not going to give up until he gets my baby sister and I refuse to let him have her, especially after all the stuff he put her through.  
Adam throws a blow to my jaw and I fall on my back, all the wind in me being knocked out.  
I say "You know what, go ahead, hurt me, I'd so much rather you hurt me than hurt my baby sister or Ryan."  
That's the first good thing I've ever said about Ryan ever since he broke my baby sisters fragile heart. He may have hurt my sister, left her broken after him, but he's still that boy I met back at the beginning of him and her deep down, and I'm still going to stick up for him when it comes to him and her and who is best for my little sister.  
I lay on the ground watching his moves as he slowly backs up from me and I push myself up from the ground.  
Maybe he will come around and see that, but honestly, something in my gut tells me he won't get over my sister and the crazy obsession he has with her.  
I need to go talk to Ryan and get all of this mess about Adam that I don't have straight to be straight.  
I don't have the full story as Ryan does.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I look at my phone to see Noah's name pop up.  
What does Noah Styles want with me?  
I answer the phone and say "Yes Noah?" He says "Adam just beat me up to find Noelle, what in the world is the deal between you and him and my baby sister?" I say "He has this strange obsession with her, you can tell that I hope."  
He sat there and used her for her love and vulnerability and she had absolutely no clue. I hate him with every part of my whole being.  
Noah says "He has some kind of messed up obsession with her."  
A scowl takes over my features. She didn't even fuel the obsession he has with her, yet every time I'm around her, he sits there and looks her up and down. Like she's a meal. She's my girlfriend and he has no right to look at her like that.  
I say "So what are we going to do now? Are we going to continue fighting over the fact that I hurt your baby sister, or team up to fight the guy that is using your baby sister for his enjoyment?"  
I hear his scowl grow across his face at the reminder of what I did to his sister. I do hate myself for hurting her like that, but I didn't know I really did love her as I do now.  
He says "Ryan Scott, I know you hurt my baby sister, but I refuse to let him hurt her any longer than what he has now. What do we do?"  
A smirk spreads across my face.  
May Adam Blake get prepared for what he is about to go through.

(Adam's P.O.V.)  
*flashback*  
I look at Becca and smile.  
This girl has been my whole world for the longest time, I've never expected to grow close to a girl like I have this one.  
She says "Dam, I love you." I say "I love you too my Bec Bec."  
I watch as she smiles fondly at the nickname and giggles.  
I say "So are we going to go to our dinner date, love?"  
She nods and twirls around in her beautiful dress that I love seeing her in.  
I say "Come on then darling, no sense in letting them wait on Mr and Mrs Adam Kendall Blake." She smiles and says "Ok Dam."  
I walk her to my 1989 Mini Corvette as she slides in and we drive to the restaurant. She turns on Way Too Beautiful by Sean Kingston and sings along to every lyric. Her singing is so angelic, just like her. My blue eyes capture her and she blushes.  
I say "I love you so much Bec." She says "I lo- ADAM!!"  
Before I know it, she's flying through the windshield and I'm trying to get a grasp on her small figure.  
*end flashback*  
I wake up panting hard struggling to catch my breath.  
That girl was my world. My everything. Her death impacted me in more ways than is imaginable.  
I look at my sweat covered body and groan.  
I haven't had that dream in a while ever since I had Noelle to keep me from them.  
I look at the clock to see 4:15 a.m. I have work in exactly 4 hours and before that time I have to calm myself down and make myself seem unaffected by this nightmare I just had and make sure that no one can see past my facade I've made ever since she left my side. The only person that has ever known about her that I've ever told about her is Noelle. She is the closest thing to Becca I've ever had and perhaps that's why I use her for her vulnerability. Because it's the only way I know to love anymore. I can't let anyone get past my facade, I can't let anyone break down the walls I've built and by that, I break other people's walls and use their vulnerability to hurt them.  
That's my thing. 

(Noah's P.O.V.)  
I know exactly what Ryan is thinking. He wants to hurt Adam for hurting his girlfriend and I don't blame him honestly. He has every right to. After all, they were always there for each other no matter what happened until he ended up breaking her heart, just like that, leaving her broken. I knew directly after that she wasn't going to be the girl I knew my whole life and had the pleasure of being a good older brother to. It never was just that that ended up shaping her into the person she is now. She did have a traumatic experience when she was younger and that tears her apart daily, trust me, I know that for sure. But I sure am not going to sit around and let him tear her apart. She deserves so much better than Adam even as her boss. I look at a blank screen as Ryan's name pops up, signalling he is sending me a text. It states: "Noah, want to hear my plan?" I reply "Sure, Scott." I don't get a reply for a couple of minutes so I go to call a nice pizza place for a to-go Margherita Pizza. I hop in my Range Rover and start to drive to the pizza place and pick up my pizza. I hear my notification sound ring and I let it sit there till I arrive at the pizza place. I sit in my Ranger Rover as I arrive and pick up my phone and see Ryan sent me a text stating "My plan is I'm going to text Adam from Noelle's phone and talk to him about Becca, his old past lover and hurt him from her." I frown and say "Ry, doesn't that seem beyond horrible?" He responds "I have no clue how much he has hurt my Noelle, I have no clue how much and how he even did. I could damage him as much as he damaged my girl. It's called payback and he deserves it for hurting my girl." I look down and say "Let's do it." 

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I know that's a horrible plan and I shouldn't do such a thing to him, but it just seems like he should be hurt the same way my Noelle was hurt. It just seems that he has no right to hurt her like that and not have any consequences for his action. Maybe I should change my plan but for now, that's the plan and we are going to do it. I understand maybe I shouldn't hurt him that much, but just as I told Noah, I have no idea how much he hurt her and how bad he hurt her. It's payback and he deserves it for hurting her, she's been through more than enough throughout her life just with her past and with me, he never should've even happened. I look over at my phone and text Noah "Do you have a different plan?" I can't believe I'm showing sympathy for the person that crushed my girl, but I know she would be so hurt and so destroyed if the person she is falling back in love with were to crush her person that is causing so much drama in her life such a horrible, twisted trauma by messing with his damaged past. She's still the caring Noelle I fell in love with and my dark and twisted mind and way of hurting people are going to have to calm down to fit her. I'd never want to hurt her.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I look over at the small 2 and a 1/2-year-old in the back of my car in his little booster seat.  
He's so much like his daddy. Beautiful eyes, lovely brown hair, and he has a wild, charming, innocent look in his eyes like his dad did when he was younger.  
I say "Har, you want to go home and read or play with some of your toys?" He says "I can pway wif my toys and you can read to me if you want." I say "I'd love to darling. What do you want me to read?" He says "Hmmm, Pwide and Pwejudife." I say "Darcy and Elizabeth."  
He hums lightly and smiles. I laugh at the small being and grin as I approach our apartment. I get out of my car and get out and get him out of his seat as I carry him in the apartment.  
I look around and see a small stain of blood on the wall and wince. The blood isn't fresh but it isn't exactly old either.  
I place Hardin down on the floor and say "Pick out some toys to play with, I'm going to go change and do something quickly afterwards and get Pride and Prejudice and read it to you okay?" He says "Ok mummy. I love you." I say "I love you Har."  
I walk to Ryan and I's room and go change into one of his hoodies and a pair of leggings.  
A smooth flashback of blood on the wall flashes in my mind and I wince hard.  
He must've done that when he was looking for my journals back a few days ago.  
I really must've gotten to him.  
I walk into the living room where Hardin is to see him playing with a small blue ball and walk in the kitchen and get a wet paper towel and walk up to the wall and wash away the blood quickly.  
Hardin looks up at me then looks away.  
I say "What is it, love?" He says "That's daddy's isn't it?" A frown takes over my features as I say "Yes angel, it's his." He says "Daddy is sometimes aggressive when he gets mad because of you." I say steadily frowning "I know baby. That's one of his Hardin traits." He says "I know mum. I used to have to stop him it'd be so bad. But he's a lot calmer than he used to be."  
I walk away from the wall that used to be stained red and walk to where Hardin is with Pride and Prejudice in my hands.  
He says "Mummy, let's just talk." I say "Ok baby, what do you want to talk about?" He says "Why does daddy punch walls?" I say "That's the only way he knows to let out his anger." He says "So daddy punches walls like Hardin?"  
I nod and blush at the mention of my favourite fictional character in the whole world.  
I am Tessa in that sense, I do have a boyfriend that punches walls because that is the only way he knows to let out his anger.  
He's Hardin on that.  
But his Hardin-ness is...  
He's very broken.  
I don't think anyone could ever understand that.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I watch as Noelle's car gets out of our driveway and disappears into thin air. I feel as if I know where she is going and I just don't want to say where. If it's where I think it is, then, I need to be there to hold her as she breaks into a gasp and breaks down crying. I hope she's not driving there. I look at the wall where I know I punched because there is a nice sized hole in it. She has done clean up my blood. Did Hardin see my blood on the walls? What did she tell him? What does he think of me? I bring my hand to touch the clean wall. I feel her stand against the wall pressing all of her weight to take off that stain. I look at where the copy of Pride and Prejudice sits. Resting calmly waiting to be touched again. Waiting to be picked up and read every line that rests on its pages. I walk over to it and run my fingertips across the pages that show desperately how many times I've read that book and a scowl takes over my features at where blood has stained the pages from my various fights with my dad. You'd think that the man figure in my life would've been perfect... Far from it. He came home wasted every day and beat up my mum every night. I wince at the screams in my head. She deserved so much better just as my Noelle did. I look at my busted, ruined knuckles and scowl deeper. That piece of rubbish hurt my mum and ended up destroying her whole life. I throw the book on the table as a letter flies out of it. The letter my dad wrote to me about 3 years ago. I angrily open it up and begin reading the words representing nothing to me. "Dear Ryan, I've heard from around town you haven't been doing too good. I can't help but blame myself on that part. I've cut down on my drinking. Not that good I know, so I've been trying to fully stop. I remember looking into your mum's eyes and trying to make sure that everything would be alright for her. Instead by sunrise, she'd be laying in your room and you'd be taking care of her as I should've been. She deserved so much better than me. I heard you lost Noelle. I'm so sorry, son. I've moved on and became a much better man, trying to be at least. I've been out on dates with Carla lately and her and I are about to get married. A matter of fact, we are about to have a son." My fists clench tightly and a hard scowl takes over my features. I rip the paper to shreds and put all the pieces back in the envelope. He's a liar and he ruined my whole entire childhood and life. I look at the door expecting her to be back by now and frown. She's out with our baby and I'm here scowling over my dads lies about feeling guilty about all the things he caused me in my lifetime. Why should I feel guilty about all the crap he has put me through? Before I know it, I'm seeing red and I'm punching a wall. I scowl and smash my guitar through our bookshelf. I look up and pick up a vase and slam it against the wall. I look down at all the destruction I've caused as my chest rises and falls rapidly at the adrenaline coursing through my veins. I look at the door as I hear a knock on the door. I say "Come in." through gritted teeth. The door opens to reveal my Noelle in a gasp at the destruction and mess around our house. She puts down Hardin and runs towards me and stands in front of me firmly and says "Ry, what happened?" I stand there and look around her, at the shattered pieces of a vase she stepped on, at the wood on the floor and a broken guitar which may not ever be able to be fixed ever again. What does she think right now?

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I wrap my arms safely around Ryan's waist and keep him from walking all over the glass. Hardin looks around at the mess and just stands there not making a single move.  
I fist my fingertips in Ryan's hair and say "Babe, what happened?"  
He says nothing as his head moves looking around at the destruction he caused all by himself.  
I say "Ryan James Scott, what made you this aggressive? And don't you dare try to push me away." He scowls and says "My dad. My dad makes me this aggressive. My dad makes me want to push people away, Noelle." I stand there and say "Ryan, how did you even know about your dad, the last time I heard about your dad was a year before we broke up." He scowls deeper and says "Yeah, the few months following our break up, the piece of trash decided to write me a note and the last thing I remember was seeing red and destroying everything." I frown softly and whimper as I whisper "Shh baby, let me bring you out of that darkness you just felt that I know you just felt."  
His scowl turns into a soft straight face as he tries to soften up for me. I am his angel, his beacon of light always needed after his demons battle him to go to his dark place. His arms wrap around my waist and his lips press to my neck as I smile softly and blush.  
He looks down at me and says "Why do you always try to save a wretch like me when you are such an angel?" A blush forms over my cheeks as I say "The same reason that I always see light and hope in you when you consistently claim there is none. You are the person that I have faith in Ryan and no matter how many demons I fight for you and how many times the light in you fades out, I'll be there as your angel to fight your demons and to make your light in you shine bright." He looks at me and says "Did all my prayers lead me to you?" I shrug and say "All my wrongs led me to the one thing in my life that is right...you." His straight face turns into a small smirk and he says "I love you, Noelle Evelyn Sawyer." I reply softly "And I love you, Ryan James Scott."

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
How did I manage to get an angel as my girlfriend? I never thought I'd be able to get anyone to love me and just to my luck I'd get the perfect angel to be mine. Have I made mistakes in us? Managed to break her? Destroyed her? Then, built her back up and made her into the exact angel she was before all of it? Yes, yes I, THE Ryan James Scott, have. I've done all of that. Broke her and restored her. She's changed a lot, give or take, but she's still the angel I've fallen in love with. We are right for each other. Despite my aggression, she still loves me and despite my demons, she still fights with me to save me from their darkness.  
I look at her and say "I break you every time you save me?" She looks down and says "Loving you is worth it." I say "I'm sorry I'm so destructive and way too aggressive baby."  
She looks at me and holds me close to her small body. I hear her breathing slow and feel her eyes close. She's safest in my arms and I'm safer in hers. She makes me so happy.  
She says "Don't be sorry, your dad hasn't been a dad to you ever and I fully understand that baby, he just, he's trying to make amends with you and to you that isn't right because you were neglected when you were younger due to his drinking issue and you've had that trauma with your mom being abused every night. But he's trying his hardest." I scowl and say "Noelle, he is trying...was trying...to make amends after you broke up with me and on top of that he is about to have a whole new family with someone else and have a whole other son."  
She winces at my scowl and whimpers. She's very sensitive to my hurt and I look at her brows furrowed and her smile turns into a soft frown as her eyes hold hurt behind them quickly. I move my hand to cup her cheeks to make her look at me.  
I say "Noelle, I'm sorry, I'm just, I'm hurt by him, he's impacted my aggression and my drinking." She looks at me and says "Your drinking?" I nod ashamed and say "I've only drank when I'm by myself."  
I watch as she studies my moves and places her hands on my chest.  
I say "Are you scared of me, knowing I drink?" She shakes her head no and says "I'm not scared of you, I could never be scared."  
I watch as her eyes get darker and hold more intensity than they did before.  
I say "I'd never hurt you even if I were drunk, you sober me up quicker than anything and you aren't someone I'd hurt while I'm drunk." She says "I know that. I've seen it before which you were drunk. You'd get mad, but you'd never get so aggressive to the point to hurt me." I say "I know, baby. If I hurt you I'd die."

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
*flashback*  
A smirk flashes across my face as I welcome the familiar burn of confidence scorching down my throat.  
Hardin is over Colby's and I'm here alone at the house that holds nights of coming home positively enraged over Noelle's way of managing to get mad over small things and make something out of nothing.  
She stresses me out and makes me so mad I punch walls, but as she lays in our room, I welcome the ordinary burn of scotch down my throat and the satisfaction of tonight leaving my mind making me a bit more sane in my thoughts.  
My thoughts.  
How do I gather them?  
A guy friend, of ours, touches me and she gets ticked at me.  
"Good job self." I think to myself and punch a wall.  
He touched me. I didn't want it to happen. It was only one-sided.  
That girl infuriates me yet I still love her. We are toxic in own way and I just can't get enough of it because as I drink away today, my drug, comes back and fights for me. She could hurt me, but I'd hold her and let her hold me just to be able to see if my love is okay.  
Did I pick an angel who's secretly a devil?  
I go into our room and set down my phone and don't turn into her.  
I can't, I can't give her that satisfaction she wants.  
She turns over and says "Scott, I'm horrible at love, at us." I huff and say "We are new at this, it's obvious."  
She says "How can I fight so much? H-Have so much fight in me? I wish I want, I need, I am going to change that, I promise." and with that and her sharp intake of breath as I tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear basking in her beauty, she drifts to sleep.  
*end of flashback*  
We haven't fought consistently like that since. I think May 19th. Yeah. May 19th, 8 years ago.  
My angel promised me that and we haven't fought since.  
Well, we play fight, but not fight. I haven't felt the need to fight with her since. But my own personal demons are trying to take me down and now there's nothing more I could need rather than my fighter.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
I look at the destruction around Noelle's feet. A torn paged The Great Gatsby, piece of shard glass and liquor feels the room.  
Why is she standing here in the midst of my mess comforting me? The girl would normally be cleaning up herself by now silently and instead she's standing in my wake comforting me.  
I bite down on my lip as she gets on her knees to begin cleaning up the shards of glass around her feet. I softly say "Get up. There's no way I'm going to let you get hurt because of me." She replies back stubbornly "No Ry. I'm going to help you pick up your mess. I've already been hurt before because of you... Right now, what really is the difference between those time and this time? That time you hurt me hurt as bad as a billion shards of glass plummeting into my skin. There's really not a difference in this physical pain and that emotional pain, they both hurt as bad as the other does coming from you."  
I don't understand. I don't get what she means by this, it hurts as bad as any other pain she feels because of me.  
I say nothing as she cleans up the shards. I get down on my knees to help her clean up my mess in complete silence.  
Her quiet is always so terrifying. I'd prefer her scream at me, but instead, as she picks up the glass from the broken liquor bottles she steadily stays quiet.  
As soon as she finishes picking up the broken glass, she walks away into our room taking our baby with her.  
I walk slowly to the room we share, listening to their conversation about me. Sounds like something Hardin would do to one of Tessa and Smith's conversations but oh well.  
She says "I just don't want him to push me away because of his dad. I don't want the distance between us." He says "I know mum. He's just. He's daddy. He's going to sit there and break things and make messes, he's going to feel the necessity to push you away."  
I felt my heartbreak as they talk about me this way. No way was I going to push her away as I do everyone, she is supposed to be the one person in my life I love the most to not want to shove away and shut away. I'm not going to shut her out...  
Not anymore.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
*flashback*  
At least one time in your life...everything is good. Everything is at it should be and everything is just content. Until your whole life has been you being taken advantage of just to get in your pants and get you vulnerable.  
Well. That's been me my whole life.  
Try to do good..get taken advantage of.  
Let people in...become vulnerable.  
Tell one person all of your darkest secrets...just to have your virginity stolen later.  
What made this world so dark? So broken? So evil?  
I look at Ryan's last text he sent me: "I regret all of yesterday."  
This always happens. Except for the fact that it wasn't just one thing that happened to me. It was all of them combined. By a lover I was true to.  
I'm done being taken advantage of...  
From now on I'm done. I'm going to wait for a guy to come to me and confess how true he is. How faithful he is to me.  
*end of flashback*  
Well. Ryan's been working towards that a lot lately actually.  
Even the broken pieces of glass remind me how much he is trying...despite his aggression always trying to win him over in the end.  
I'm quiet.  
I have nothing to say.  
At this point in time, I'm more worried about him rather than myself.  
That's how I always am.  
That's how I've always been from the very beginning of my vulnerability.  
I look over at messy brown locks being tugged at by bloody hands and getting drug in busted knuckles.  
He's so broken.  
If only I could fix him.  
But there's no sense in fixing what already is broken when there seems to be no cure. There's only so much hope you can give to it. So much til you break.  
He looks at me with a hurt look behind his eyes, the same look behind his eyes that I had behind mine the exact day he told me that I didn't love him and then broke up with me.  
How does his dad hurt him as badly as he hurt me that day?  
My hurt I felt that day hurt more than anything in the whole world. That hurt haunts me every day I look into his grey-blue-green eyes and his lips part to say "I regret everything I've ever done to hurt you."  
Him bringing it up is my weakness.  
He...is my weakness.  
He makes me weak and I make him strong.  
Too strong...

(Colby's P.O.V.)  
*flashback*  
Noelle texts me: "Meet me at the mall in 2? I could use a serious shopping pick me up." I quickly respond back with "Yeah. Just let me put on some skinnies and a shirt and I'll meet you in the food court. How about that, love?" She replies "Okay C. Love you." I say "Love you too."  
I put on some grey skinnies, all my black and red and even my one orange pair is dirty, and a light teal blue button-up shirt to highlight my brown eyes and my sharp jawline. Then I walk to the bathroom and run my hands through my messy light brown swishy hair and tug the ends lightly in-between my fingers. I decide to just pull a black beanie over the mess and walk out as I pull the keys to my Toyota Corolla.  
"Shopping to cheer me up..."  
I wonder what my dumb brother did now.  
I see a black beanie of hers pulled over her natural black dip-dyed red hair and a Champion hoodie along with a pair of Nike leggings.  
That's Noelle for sure.  
I walk over to her and hug her tightly earning a couple of glared from guys and a couple of groans from older women. I roll my eyes and soften against her.  
She always needs me at moments like these.  
I pull away and place my hand in hers and say "What happened babe?" Her eyes quickly get glossy and hide hurt behind them. He hurt her...again. This time, worst than the time they last broke up. Her voice gets shaky she says "He...we...broke up Colby..."  
She falls into my arms and I say "Shh..not here."  
We walk into the back of Aeropostale and begin to look at clothes as she sniffles and lets tears fall freely from her glossy brown eyes.  
What did he say to her?  
I ask "Why'd you two break up?" while I find a pair of black skinnies for me. She answers "Well. I broke up with him first because my parents caught me texting him and then I texted him later on and he said for us to fully break up and then we did...and then 4 days later I texted him as just friends and then we talked as like boyfriend and girlfriend...and then the next he said he regretted all of it and that we shouldn't have done it and that.." Her voice begins to brake harder with every violent sob leaving her broken body. She continues to look at the clothes rack she is at and scoffs against the tears "...he felt 'obligated to be with me due to how long we were together before that break up we had before that'." I say "Noelle. He's stupid. He's so stupid. But at this point. He doesn't deserve you. I've watched you time after time get hurt by him and I'm done seeing you get hurt by him and I'm done seeing you get hurt by him. You are so much better than him You sacrificed everything for him. You stopped looking out for yourself and put him first yet he does that to you and crushes your vulnerability."  
I look over at her and see the memories of them behind her golden-brown eyes.  
She's remembering them.  
I say "Noelle. You will move on from him and never come back to him. He's already declared to you he doesn't love you like he used to so why are you going to sit there and fight so hard for something back when there's nothing left to fight for?" She says slowly "Because I'm a fighter. I fight for love. I fought for him. I fought for us. And he threw it away. He fell out of love with me. And it's time. It's time I finally try to move on."  
"My heart tells me I love him, but my mind says he hurt you."~Noelle.  
*end of flashback*  
That was only a week and some days ago. That was only a week and 4 days ago to be exact and she's doing so much better without him. She hasn't moved on or anything, but she's getting better very quickly I can tell.  
It's not like she really had a life outside of him. It was always "Ryan this..." or "Ryan that...", and I'm so happy she's making a life for herself, learning slowly to move on.  
She's been so much better.  
Hardin stayed with his daddy and his mum gets to take care of him while his daddy is at work.  
Of course...I have to bring him back home to Ryan.  
Every time I ask her why won't she do it she just tells me the same answer every time.  
"Sometimes you just got to love someone from a distance."  
It's true and in a way, I think it's good for her too. I don't really want her to run back into him and then the same back and forth drama and then her be hurt all over again.  
She's going to get better.  
She just needs people to help her.  
And I'll be there.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I look at my appearance and smile. I'm finally going back to work since my break up.  
A black button-up shirt and black leggings are put on my body and I wear my black high top Converse. Purple eyeshadow and pink blush take over my facial features making my natural beauty shine over everything.  
I'm fully over him and I'm ready to work with him just as work associates and nothing more.  
I walk in the studio and look at Adam as he walks past me with a straight face. I ask "Where's Ryan? He was supposed to be here to write a new song with me since his fan base has been wanting more and more since his first single." Adam looks at me and says "Ryan is in the room waiting for you." I say "He better be."  
I walk to the room at my steady normal pace. I'm neither in a rush to see him or scared to where I'd walk as soon as possible.  
On my way there, I grab a water and a doughnut and cut it in half and give to Ada, since I've been trying to lose weight recently.  
I open the door to reveal messy brown untamed locks and a messy blue shirt with blue jeans boy sitting on the couch with his phone doing I-don't-care what. He looks up at me at my water bottle tucked under my arm and a clipboard and a binder in my hand stacked on top. He gets up fast to help me and I go to put down everything before he starts helping me.  
I say "So Ryan where would you like to begin on your new song?"  
His breathing hitches at my voice and I look up at him as he studies the ground before getting out his guitar and he starts saying "I think it should have at least one lyric that says 'I was saving you while you were killing me'." I nod and say "Okay Ryan. Anything else specific you want me to work with?" He says "Not really Noelle, j-just that...that I know of at least."  
He nods and asks "Is that all we are going to do or..." I nod and say "That the only thing I had planned to do today honestly." He asks "Would you like to go to a part Colby is hosting tonight?"  
I look at my shoes and say "Like a date or..." He says "No. Not a date. Just a plus one." I say "is it okay if I bring one of my friends with us?" He says "Like Hazel?" I stammer "Y-yeah...her." He says "She's going to bring Madden right?" I say "Yeah most likely. Is that a problem?" I can go by myself if you prefer." Sarcasm hints in his voice as he says "No Noelle...the more the merrier." as he rolls his eyes.  
I can tell he is going to be pissed by this turnout.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
What else was I supposed to tell her? "No Noelle. I only want just you as my plus one. I only want you as my date to Colby's party. I just want us to be friends without the distance it would bring of being JUST FRIENDS."  
She's going to run away as soon as I say that. She's gotten so much better without me and truth be told I don't want to ruin that for her. Ruin what she has going for herself.  
I continue and smile lightly and say "You look better by the way."  
I can tell so many words want to fall off her lips, but she's not ready to tell me any of it because we haven't even discussed the mention of even being friends.  
I want to be friends with her, but it's hard when she's making so much progress without me and I don't want to interrupt that.  
I don't want to ruin how much she has going on for herself without me now.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I take out my phone and call Hazel. She's hopefully going to come to the party with me. I don't care if she brings Madden with her as long as she comes and helps me out with being somewhere with my ex.  
Let's just focus on the fact that I, Noelle Evelyn Sawyer, have no idea what his intentions are behind inviting me to his big brother party.  
She picks up on the fourth rung and says "Sup No..." I say "Ryan invited me to Colby's party as his plus one and I was wondering if you want you can bring Madden with you."  
I hear her hesitating across the phone. I know exactly what she's thinking. I say "H...I don't know his full intentions and motives behind bringing me." She says "Hold on N. I'm going to call him after our call and protect you from him okay?" I stammer "Y-yeah..." She says "Girl. You don't still have feelings for him do you?" I ask "How can you not love your first real love?" She scoffs and says "N. I love you, but he hurt you and as your best friend in the whole world, I will not let you get back together with him because of how much you two should've never been a thing in the beginning." My breathing gets shaky and I say "I need someone new to focus on. Someone new to love. A new boyfriend. It's time for me to start looking around and find myself a new boyfriend." She says "I agree. Why don't you give Colbs a try? You and him have been best friends since the beginning and he taught you how to flirt." I say "Yeah, that's all we are though H."  
He's been my best friend through everything. I can proudly say that he is as close to me as Noah is. Why would I dare ruin that relationship just to be his girlfriend? I'd be risking everything by becoming his.

(Colby's P.O.V.)  
I look at a picture I took of Noelle's hand compared to my own, mine, of course, being the bigger one because I'm the guy and she's the girl. I've always had a secret crush on the gorgeous thing, of course, being her best friend before everything comes before loving her.  
I'm having a party for my 24th birthday, I need to text her about it though.  
I pull out my phone and text Noelle. I say "Hey love. I'm having a party tonight. Want to be my date to my party?" She texts me "I can't, Ryan already asked me."  
My jaw clenches and I tighten my fist. He already asked her? They broke up! What does he want to do with her?  
I respond with: "What did he ask you?" She says "He asked me if I'd be his date to your party."  
His date?  
Is he planning on asking her back out?  
I respond with "If he asks you out I'm going to knock him out." She answers "C. You won't hurt him. He just asked me and Hazel won't allow me to get together with him. I told you I moved on from him Colbs. A matter of fact, Hazel wants me to get together with someone I'm actually close to. But I don't want to put that on him if it could possibly ruin mine and his friendship.  
Who is she talking about? Is there someone else I don't know about?  
I respond "Who is he?"  
She doesn't respond.  
I decide to text Ryan.  
I text him "Hey. Heard you asked Noelle to be your date to my party."  
He says "What is it to you? You are just her best friend and nothing more right?" I clench my jaw at his words and take a deep breath.  
She is my best friend before everything, that's what I clearly agreed to when I first met the girl. I wasn't going to hurt her and love her before I became her best friend.  
She came with rules and an instruction manual. Not a toy for me to use but a tool for me to cherish.  
I respond with "Yes Ry. My best friend and nothing more, but what do you want with her. She's done being hurt by you." He says "I know C. I just want to be friends with her but without the distance that word brings with it okay?"  
I let out a breath I had no clue I was holding in.  
Just friends with Ryan James Scott.  
I guess that's okay with me.  
I say "Okay Ry, but if you even think about asking her back out after all the pain and drama and hurt you put her through I won't hesitate to beat you up. Am I clear?" He says "Crystal."  
I won't put a second thought towards it.  
I promise.

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I start getting ready for Colby's party tonight.  
Should I ask him out? I mean he is the person that taught me to flirt and he is my best friend, but I don't want to risk that relationship I have with him right now to become his girlfriend.  
I head a knock and say "Come in." It's probably just Hazel.  
I feel a hand snake around me to turn me around and lips press firmly to mine.  
I quickly open my eyes and push him away as my body cools off and calms down from the heat coursing through my body at the fire that is Ryan's lips.  
Ryan's lips?  
"Ryan James Scott! Why did you just kiss me? We aren't even friends anymore. What is wrong with you?"  
"I still love you, Noelle."  
"No, you don't. You do not love me, Ryan. You felt obligated to be with me for the last two months we were together. Don't think for a second that I'm going to believe you still love me because you don't. Now leave. Right. Now."  
He whispers in my ear gently "I'll see you tonight love. Wear my hoodie and your purple skinnies if you love me. If you're Colby's date, I'll know you don't love me."  
I open the door as he walks out and gives me one last glance before fully walking out. I say "I got over him. Why is he so complicated?" and punch the wall.  
I hate how he brings out the worst in me. How he manages to make my bad habits I got rid of...suddenly...come back.  
I smooth out the ruffles of the dress I was wearing and quickly take it off and put on my hoodie Hazel gave me and my dark black leggings. Forget that dress, knowing Ryan I'll end up looking like a treat he will want to devour.  
I'm not in love with him.  
Especially after that.

(Colby's P.O.V.)  
I hear a knock on the door and open it thinking it's just Ryan.  
I greeted with a kiss on the cheek and a super tight hug.  
"Noelle, what was that for?"  
"Ryan...he...Colby...he came and kissed me and told me he loved me."  
She lets go of me and holds my hand. I look at her bloody knuckles and say "He didn't hurt you did he?" She shakes her head no and her lip begins to tremble as she says "No. I punched a wall..." I look at her and say "But I thought that bad habit was gone?" She shrugs and says "He makes all the bad habits come back."  
I would've never guessed that Ryan would do something like that to her. That's not what he told me he was going to do with her...he said he only wanted to be friends with her. His motives are pure questionable now.  
Just imagine what he's going to do at my party now that that happened between the two. 

(Noelle's P.O.V.)  
I look at Colby and breathe hard.  
Ryan is coming to the party tonight. His party. Colby's party.  
What's going to happen to Colby when Ryan sees Colby's arm hooked tightly around my waist and my lips parted in a genuine laugh caused be him?  
Why does Colby have such a violently dangerous brother? I wish I could simply hide all of what happened to me from Colby but it seems as if I had managed to drag him into my mess. The mess I didn't even create.  
It's darker now and it's time for Colby's party.  
Hazel drove here with Madden since I knew I could not leave Colby's side and everyone else followed suit.  
Colby has changed to a blue button-down shirt and a pair of black trousers, he'd dress up fancy for anything involving himself and a party...I never was one to judge.  
His hand is perched on my right hip making me close to him and the other one is holding a plastic red cup with some sweet tea in it. He always was a country boy at heart no matter if he moved to New York.  
I quickly take his hand in mine as I hear the door open and hear loud stomps fill the house. I recognize that too well for my liking.  
"I see you don't love me anymore Noelle."  
I turn around to see a brown-haired boy with dark eyes. He's absolutely ticked off.  
"No, I don't and haven't ever since the day you told me that you not only felt obligated to with me for 2 months of our relationship but made me feel used and vulnerable. Since then I built up a wall only certain people in my life can break down. But never you."  
He grabs my chin roughly with a smirk as he laughs evilly.  
"You think you can get rid of me so easily Noelle but don't you realize Colby is my brother? Ther person your best friend suggested you date after me is my brother?"  
A gasp leaves my lips and I whisper to him "How did you even know about that in the first place?" He replies "I know everything Noelle. There's not a single thing you can hide from me. I've studied you and watched you...even dated you." A tear threatens to leave my eyes. "So what were we the whole time you were mine? Just an experiment? A toy? A sick lab rat?" He says "You were someone I could watch, monitor and learn the habits of to the point where I could learn everything about you and know you better than you do yourself." I say "Ryan. Leave." as I tighten my grip on Colby's hand.  
He doesn't break his gaze away from the people he's talking to care about me. I try to speak for him but nothing comes out but a whimper.  
"Trying to find a way to get me to leave are we?"  
"What are you?"  
"I'm slowly becoming your worst nightmare. It's going to get worst."  
I gasp again and shakily say "Ryan. This isn't you. Just leave me and Colby alone. Please." He says "No love. The only way you can have me leave y'all alone is if you cut me out of your life permanently." I say as a clam as I can manage "Then Ryan James Scott. You have been nothing but hell for me and I'm not putting up with it any longer. I don't want to try to be friends with you any longer. Or even try to be friends with you. We are done. You are permanently cut out of my life." And with the end of that sentence, he disappears in thin air.

(Colby's P.O.V.)  
I hear a loud thud on the ground and look down to see Noelle on her knees gasping for air.  
My hands find hers and I pick her up bridal style and carry her to my room. I say "Noelle what happened?" as I take in her bruises on her neck that is trying to hide beneath the collar of her hoodie.  
Her eyes are wide and her hair is a mess. Something happened to the girl I love. Who did this to her?  
She looks at me bewildered and wild and manages a soft scoff yet a steady voice.  
"Ryan..."  
I look at her and at my hand. How did I not know she being attacked? That sneaky boy!  
I say as calm as I can manage "Will he be bothering you any longer?" She shakes her head no and manages a small smile. "Let's get me doctored up and let's do your party I bet all of your guests are wondering where the world-famous Cole Robert Brock went with a mystery girl."  
I let out a small chuckle at her sentence. Me. The world-famous Cole Robert Brock. She is crazy.  
I take her hand and lead her to the guest room with her clothes in it. She's been staying here off and on and I know she has a dress in that closet. I tell her "Get ready. I'll be downstairs if you need me. Just shoot me a text." and wave my phone in the air for her to see.  
She nods and starts looking through the closet and says "Cole. You may leave now." I blush and say "Yes your highness." as a giggle leaves her lips.  
Now to find that sick boy.

(Ryan's P.O.V.)  
O hear footsteps behind me and recognize them as Colby's.  
I say "Here to fight me C?" He says "I'd like to but I probably won't be able to. What did you do to Noelle?" I reply "Me and her needed to talk, it was none of your concern. She is trying to keep you out of it and she cut me out of her life." He groans and says "So now we fight I'm guessing?"  
I hear his phone buzz signalling he got a text. He says "No Ryan. You gave me no reason to fight you. I have to leave regardless because princess Noelle is wondering where I am." I say "Before you go one last thing for me please..." He groans and says "What?" I say "Take Hardin to his mum." He says "What about you?" I say "She needs him more than I do."  
Goodbye Hardin...

(Colby's P.O.V.)  
I fumble with my pockets trying to find the key to my truck. I feel a cool crisp metal keychain with my keys and start my truck. I let out a loud groan and look at the empty car seat next to m.  
What is Noelle going to think when she sees Hardin with me?  
I say "Could you keep him for a few more hours...please...it's my party and I don't want to stress her out?" He says "Yes Colby...I can keep him a little while longer."  
I let out a sigh of relief. I'm going to have to tell her eventually, but I don't want to ruin her fun at my party and with the day she's had so far she does not need it.  
I arrive back home and Noelle smiles big.  
I can't tell her. That smile just proves it further.  
She says "Colby, come on, we are about to cut your cake!" I sigh heavily and say "Okay Noelle, let's go." A giggle leaves her lips as her hand grabs mine and we go to get my cake.  
How am I going to tell her?  
I got it.


End file.
